xx C0nf3ssi0ns 0f a br0ken heart xx
by TearzofBlood
Summary: based on lyric of confessions of a broken heart by lindsay lohan. Katie has always wondered about her dad and why he left her family 5 years ago. She and freddy make it a misson to find him. meanwhile, will freddy and katie realize that they are meant for
1. Chapter 1

Confessions of a broken heart

Chapter 1

I wait for the postman  
To bring me a letter  
And I wait for the good Lord  
To make me feel better  
And I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders  
Family in crisis that only grows older  
Why'd you have to go?  
Why'd you have to go?  
Why'd you have to go?

Daughter to father  
Daughter to father  
I am broken, but I am hoping  
Daughter to father  
Daughter to father  
I am crying, a part of me's dying  
and these are  
These are the confessions  
Of a broken heart

And I wear all your old clothes  
Your polo sweater  
I dream of another you  
One who would never, never  
Leave me alone  
To pick up the pieces  
Daddy to hold me  
That's what I needed  
So why'd you have to go?  
Why'd you have to go?  
Why'd you have to go?

Daughter to father  
Daughter to father  
I don't know you, but I still want to  
Daughter to father  
Daughter to father  
Tell me the truth  
Did you ever love me?  
'Cuz these are, these are,  
the confessions  
Of a broken heart  
Of a broken heart

I love you  
I love you  
I love you  
I, I love you...

Daughter to father  
Daughter to father  
I don't know you, but I still want to  
Daughter to father  
Daughter to father  
Tell me the truth  
Did you ever love me?  
Did you ever love me?  
These are  
The confessions  
Of a broken heart

Oh yeah  
And I wait for the postman  
To bring me a letter...

"KATILYN MARIE BROWN!" mom shouted at me. "What!" I shrieked. I was upstairs in my bathroom, getting ready for our bon fire party and mom had been calling me for the past 5 minutes. "What?" I called again, waiting for an answer. "The guest are here" was her only reply.

Sighing, I headed down stairs and greeted most of my sister's friends. We were having a gathering and mom and Kaera had invited all of her friends who are, in my opinion, total JERKS! Never the less, I was still expected to be nice to them. I walked outside in the back yard and cautiously said "hey, what's up?" "Not much" Alex replied, along with his annoying jock posse from school. All I can say was I am sooooo happy that my sister and I go to different schools.

Ten minutes later all of the people arrived and to my disgust, the bored guys kept hitting on me. GROSS! Talk about LoSeRs! Thankfully, I glanced two houses down, only to see my best guy friend and also my possible crush, Freddy Jones, shooting hoops in his driveway. "JONES!" I screamed "C'Mer!"

He jogged over and clung his arm over my shoulder casually. "What's up Posh?" "umm spazzy, you need to save me. These morons keep hitting on me" I pleaded desperately. I knew he'd help me and have a bit on fun himself, so as I watched the grin slowly spread across his face, I knew this would be an interesting night.

Now Freddy didn't exactly look 15, he looked way older with his bad boy image. Tonight he was wearing black baggy pants and a Metallica t- shirt. "Yo, you messin with my girl?" he demanded, grabbing the collar of Alex. "y- You're g-g-girl?" Alex stuttered nervously. I grinned, but it quickly faded once I remember that he'd beat me to a bloody pulp once he realized Freddy wasn't serious. "Yeah" Freddy growled angrily as he released him. "Stay the fuck away from her." With that, he grabbed my hand and dragged me over to the pine trees. "Spazzy…" I moaned, "You we're supposed to threaten the guy or tell him I'm your girlfriend. Once he find out, he'd gonna kill me for making a fool of him." Freddy's face fell, then twisted into one of anger and complete rage. "He hurts you?" Oops. Quickly, I shut my mouth and hugged him. "Anyway, thanks for saving me. Let's go to your house. I got a remix Metallica cd." "okay!" he nodded as I shouted to mom where I was going.

When we got to his house, I sat on the floor and thought. I couldn't help thinking about dad. I missed him. Everything about him. I missed his laugh, his smell, his hugs, his voice. Tears burned inside of me. He left when I was 10. why did he go?

Freddy walked in and I quickly wiped all traces of tears away. But he was too fast. I couldn't hide it from him. We've been best friends since 3rd grade. He even knew my dad. "kates, what's wrong?" "nothing…" I mumbled, "just thinking about dad." And with that, the tears came. Faster and harder than they'd ever come before. Daughter to father, daughter to father, tell me the truth, did you ever love me?


	2. Chapter 2

Okay…. Thanks for the reviews. Got some great advice. I love you all! x0 Roxii

Chapter 2: wipe my tears away

"Posh, don't cry…" Freddy said comfortingly. "I'm not" I replied quickly, wiping my tears away. "Only babies cry. Hey fred?" "hmm?" he mused, stroking my hair softly.

"I'm going to find my dad. I miss him and I won't rest until I know why he left. Dad's don't just get up and leave when they are in the middle of a family with no reason. Its 2 weeks until school ends. I'm leaving the day after school gets out." I said defiantly.

"Kates, that's crazy, you know it! What about the band? Summer? She'll KILL you! I mean, you don't even know where the hell he is now…" he pleaded with me.

I sighed. "Spaz, Summer has a program on her computer where you can look up people and find their address and everything. Normally we use it for pranks, but last time we had a sleepover, I got all the info I need."

I felt terrible because Freddy looked so depressed. Sadly, I gave him a hug and whispered "I'll be back, I promise. I just need to find dad." He turned around and looked me in the eye. "But what about me?"

My breath caught in my throat. "What about you?" I asked. "You will still have a great summer. You can go to the movies with Zack and have band practice and go out with all the bimbo blonde cheerleaders that you always love. You don't need me."

I stood up to go but he grabbed my hand and said "Posh! That's not nice. I do need you. You're my best friend."

"Whatever" I said, rolling my eyes, tears burning in the back of them. "That's all lies. I haven't been important to you since Brittany."

"Brit? What does she have to do with this?" "Hmmm… you tell me. She's your snobby, perfect girlfriend who hates my guts and gets you to ignore me whenever I have something to tell you. Whatever Freddy. I gotta get home now."

So I ran out of the house, all the way into my room, slammed the door shut, and burst into tears. I turned on my radio only to hear the words…

"I open my eyes  
I try to see but I'm blinded by the white light  
I can't remember how  
I can't remember why  
I'm lying here tonight

And I can't stand the pain  
And I can't make it go away  
No I can't stand the pain

How could this happen to me  
I made my mistakes  
I've got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream  
How could this happen to me

Everybody's screaming  
I try to make a sound but no one hears me  
I'm slipping off the edge  
I'm hanging by a thread  
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered  
And I can't explain what happened  
And I can't erase the things that I've done  
No I can't

How could this happen to me  
I made my mistakes  
I've got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream  
How could this happen to me

I made my mistakes  
I've got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream  
How could this happen to me"


	3. Chapter 3

Once again, thanks for reviewing. Xoxoxo Rox

Chapter 3: Take Your Sweet Time

The next day I woke up and found that almost all of Kaera's friends slept over.

"MOOOOOOOMMMMM!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, "WHERE IS MY CELL!"

"Downstairs, charging… and be quiet, you'll wake everyone up Katie!"

I "hmphed" and tromped down the stairs, muttering about meeting Summer at Starbucks. Grabbing my cell, I walked out the door.

"Katie!" Summer squealed when I finally walked in Starbucks. " How are you?"

"Oh just peachy. Kaera had a party last night, everyone slept over, and I yelled at Jones. You?"

"Nothing that bad" she replied, "What's up with you and Fred?"

"Well, I sorta yelled at him about Brittany Roberts. She's so annoying and preppy and UGH! He totally ignores us when she's around. Frankly, I'm sick of it" I spat out.

"I catch your drift. And I'm totally with ya on that one. She is a total piece of work. Oh by the way, don't kill me, but I, um, kinda invited Freddy and Zack to hang out with us today."

"Noooo…." I moaned, "Life hates me!"

Laughing, Summer dragged me over to the counter to order our coffee.

I completely ignored the boys as I ordered. "Yeah, hi, I'll have a Carmel Frappacino."

"Hey Summer, hey Katie!" The boys chorused.

Smirking, I walked out the door into the refreshing morning air with my coffee in hand.

We, well, mostly Summer, decided that we should go shopping.

"No. No and no. I am NOT going in Abercromie. I HATE THAT SLUTTY STORE. NONONONONONONONONONO!" I screamed, throwing a temper tantrum as Summer dragged me with a death grip into the store.

"Katie! Get a grip! We're just going to buy a couple of shirts."

"Fine!" I hissed, "But after this I am going into the hair salon. I need to re dye my hair."

As Summer flew thru the racks, trying to find bargains, I pouted near the entrance.

"Hey Posh" Freddy said, coming up behind me.

I just glared at him. "What the hell do you want Jones?"

"To talk to you. I thought about what you said last night and well, you're right. Right about Brittany. I'm really sorry Posh. I should have listened. Brit isn't the greatest person ever. So I kinda broke up with her."

"Good for you. The almighty Freddy Jones has finally done something smart. Excuse me while I go tell Summer" I said sarcastically, scampering off.

Finally we went to get my hair done. I decided on Black hair with hot pink highlights. When I saw it when it was finished, I was amazed. It looked so cool!

We got back to my house at dinner time and that's when I decided to put Plan D.A.D into action. Tomorrow was officially the second day of summer. No one would suspect a thing.

I turned to my friends, fake yawned and said "Wow. I'm getting really tired. I'll see you guys tomorrow or something."

Summer and Zack totally bought it, but Freddy just narrowed his eyes. I gave them all hugs and went inside.

"Mom?" Hearing no answer, I looked on the table to find a note.

Katie,

Kaera went to the movies with Tim. The twins came four days early – Aunt Jackie called earlier. I went to help her for the week. Be a good girl and listen to you sister while I'm gone. Kaera and I already ate. I left some money incase you and Freddy want to order Pizza. By the way, your new cousin's names are Jeremy and Jennifer.

Love,

Mom

"Awww… Jerry and Jenny, how cute! Heck yes! Mom's gone!" I cried, pumping my fist in the air.

This was going better than expected. Kaera would be out until late tonight, and mom would be gone for the week!

"I leave tonight!"

I ran up to my room, packing all the was necessary. I stuffed a blanket, a couple of rock shirts, jeans, money, cd's, my cd player and my picture and information on dad. According to the Internet program, he's in Los Angeles. Fun, Fun!

Everything was set to go when all of the sudden… "DING DONG!" The doorbell rang.

"Who the hell is that? I need to go…" I grumbled, answering the door.

"Hey Posh. Can I come in?"

"ummmm… sure. Yeah. I guess. What's up?"

"nothing really, I guess I just thought you'd be in bed cause you said you were tired." Freddy commented.

He had me there. "yeah, I was just getting ready for bed."

"So you were planning on going to bed in jeans, a hoody and your shoes already on?" he asked questioningly.

"Look Spazzy, you got me. I'm leaving. Right now. For LA. I'm all packed, mom is gone for the week, and I left a note for Kaera, telling her I'm staying at Summer's. This is my chance."

He grinned. "I knew you'd be going. I can't believe Summer and Zack fell for your little 'Oh I'm tired' act. Sooooo, I packed my stuff in my backpack too. I'm going with you."

My jaw dropped. "Nuh uh. Spazz, you could get in so much trouble."

"Who cares, I mean, I have to protect you, and its not like I never get in trouble. Besides, its something fun to do, and I miss your dad too."

"Alrighty Jones, let's go then."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: thanks to all who reviewed.

Luckycharm04, thanks for reviewing. Yes I do know that his name is freddy. Fred is used as a nickname if u can't tell already.

ILUVfire, THANK U SO MUCH FOR REVIEWING! They should totally make a sequel to the movie!

Drummerchick, thanks for reading!

Chapter 4: Tell me something I don't already know….

"Wow. I can't believe in all of the 15 years that I've lived here, I've never even been to this airport! It's gigantic!" I exclaimed, completely floored.

"Yeah well, you get used to it. C'mon Posh, we gotta pick up our tickets!"

"But we haven't got them yet…" I protested as he dragged me to the self baggage check.

Grinning, he pulled out two tickets. Once again, I was beyond floored. "Kate… I read your journal. Don't kill me. I decided if u were hell bent on finding your dad, that we better go soon. So I ordered and printed our tickets out online."

I Shrieked and jumped up and down, overwhelmed with excitement… until I looked at the flight time. "Oh shit! We board in ten minutes! Quick! We have to check our bags in!"

"No time. We'll have them as our carry on's."

Ugggghhhhh… I hate flying! I said to myself as the plane began to move.

Half way thru the flight I forgot about my fear and became bored. "fredddddd" I whined, "I'm so bored now!"

Luckily, there were hardly any people on the plane. Night flights must not be very popular…

I decided to take a nap and fell asleep instantly. Everything was quiet and peaceful when suddenly "AHH!" I screamed.

"Posh, calm down! I just want you to listen to this song." He handed me his ipod and I grinned awkwardly.

I put the earphones in and instantly recognized the song. "Broken" by Seether.

"I wanted you to know, I love the way you laugh, I want to hold you high and steal your pain away, I keep you photograph and I know it serves me well, I wanna hold you high and steal your pain… 'cause I'm broken when I'm open and I don't feel right when your gone away…" I sang softly.

Carefully, I glanced at Freddy, who was peacefully sitting with his eyes closed. Studying him, I noticed a stay unspiked hair on his forehead. Almost on impulse, I reached out and brushed it out of the way.

Sighing, I slid back in my chair and closed my eyes. Jones. He was so perfect. Why does it always seem when you want something the most, you can never get it, no matter how hard you try…


	5. AN

A/N:

To MadiWillow: Sweetie, read between the lines. It is based on the song "Confessions of a BROKEN heart" by Lindsay lohan. You see, confessions of a BROKE heart would make no sense AND it's a grammatical error. Please remember, this is a FAN FIC, not an essay contest. Thanks for the review hun, although we could have done without it… and thanks to everyone else who reviewed! 


End file.
